Warning! This entry was written by “Me” for me. Sounds confusing I know, but if you can keep your focus I think we can all get there in one piece. “Me” is who I really am… not the me that most folks know. If you know “Me” then you really know me. If you’ve followed this far then it’s probably safe for you to go on.
I couldn’t find “Me”
I knew I had put “Me” somewhere, but where?
614 days is too long a time to remember where one has set aside one’s “Me”.
614 days is too long a time to remember why one has set aside one’s “Me”.
614 days is too long a time to remember that you even had a “Me”!
614 days is how long it takes to realize that you miss that thing that makes one “Me”.
614 days of one not being “Me” but just me…
1 millisecond is all it takes to remember you need to find “Me” or you’ll lose “You” forever.
I lost “Me” in a slow fade…bad day at work, too busy, social media, feeling like “Me” has nothing to say that you want to hear…it all adds up.
Slowly at first. Then a little slower. Slower…GONE!!
Buried under self doubts, self condemnation, self absorption, fear of rejection and maybe worst of all…a fear of irrelevance (we older folk seem to fear this one in particular.)
A few days ago Sandy introduced me to a book by Steven Furtick entitled “Crash the Chatterbox”. It’s probably a pretty good book…I just haven’t been able to get past the introduction. I bumped into a sentence.
One sentence…one sentence is all it took to wake “Me” up.
“My soul sometimes feels like a Twitter feed where I’m following a million of the most annoying people ever, and I can’t find the Unfollow button.”
But I have found the Unfollow button!
“Me” had it!
I began to notice that something was missing…but I didn’t know that that something was “Me”.
At 5:30 am today, “Me” pressed the “Unfollow” button and screamed…”It’s time. Let’s write.”
614 days later “Me” has managed to kick my way out of the pile of rubbish that had kept “Me” buried beneath the “chatter”.
614 days later “Me” reemerges!
614 days later “Me” needs a bath and a shave.
“Me” is back albeit a little wobbly and unkempt, but back nonetheless.
I needed “Me” and I know that now. With all due respect Dear Reader…I need to do this Chatterbox crashing thing for me. Like it & love it or hate it & leave it…I need “Me” to keep me who I am.
I do this for “Me” cuz I wasn’t very happy just being me…
Now “Me”…lets go get you cleaned up some…you got some work to do!